Salt in the wound

Well, if my recent humiliations were not enough to prove to you just how “little” I really am…here is how salt has been added to the wounds…
I found out last night that while my daughter was roaming the front of church, Father anounces (from the altar!!!) “We seem to have a lost child up here…..Stacey??” #@*($&#@(*$&@#*&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had no idea! No WONDER so many people were staring at me as I came back into the church! He had called my NAME!!! ooooh, my face is red just thinking about it! I could cry all over again!
And then, today, I found out that the little sunday school I sent her to with all the other kids wasn’t really a good thing without it’s own set of humiliations. Turns out that the 10:30 am Sunday School is only for kindergarteners on up and it is not free. You have to like, register! And the preschool of religion is at the 9:00 am mass!! (*&#@(*@&#$@*)(!@)(*&^!@%$@!!!!!!!!! Can I crawl under a rock and just DIE??

Oh Lord. I need this prayer now more than ever:

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,
Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being loved…
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I …
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should…

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2 thoughts on “Salt in the wound

  1. Missy says:

    Oh Stacey….first of all…your blog looks beautiful! Someday I’ll take the time to do something with mine. Second, thank you for sharing your humility. How embarassing to have the priest speak your name out in front of the congregation! You will someday laugh…I promise you.

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